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Relational Life Therapy (RLT) Couples Coaching -12 Sessions

Amanda Kocsis

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Imagine for just a moment, what it could be like if the biggest issue in your relationship was resolved?   What would that look like, feel like, and sound like?  What do you want to achieve at the end of these 12 sessions with your partner?

I am trained in RLT couples coaching (relational life therapy), under my mentor and author of "US", Terry Real, from the Relational Life Institute.  My practice can be in-person for NE Ohio residents or virtual zoom sessions, regardless of location.

What is RLT Couples Coaching?
Relational Life couples coaching creates transformation, individually as well as relationally.  This work promotes relational empowerment (not just individual empowerment) and full respect living with oneself and with others.
This style of coaching entails 3 phases:
  1. Phase 1- Gathering the data and finding "the dance"
    • The "dance" refers to what each partner does when things escalate or what triggers each other.
    • Ex: when partner A does this, partner B reacts and does that.  When B does that then partner A reacts and does this.....and round and round they go.
  2. Phase 2- Innerchild Work and Family Dynamics and History
    • Innerchild work, also similar to IFS (Internal Family Systems), or Parts work, or shadow work, all do one main thing: discover the wounded child and adaptive parts, your younger self that was scared or hurt, abandoned (physically or emotionally) whose needs were not met.
    • The adaptive parts (yet still young) to learned to "adapt" in order to survive and protect themselves to get some of their needs met in what ever manner they could.
    • Looking at the family of origin dynamics and history has a major impact from when we were young, what was modeled to us in relationships (the good, the bad, and the ugly), and how we adapted to avoid or get what we needed.
  3. Phase 3- Apply effective tools for long-term transformation
  • Tools and practices are set in place to allow for acceptance of your partner's limitations and boundaries, as well as your own limitations and boundaries.  
  • Tools and exercises to help know when your nervous system is in a good place to have a conversation or not in a good place and needs space.
  • Continuing to practice various tools and exercises will long-term change character traits, which starts by changing behaviors.  
  • this style of coaching helps to build continual awareness, mindfulness, and intentional work from the couple outside of sessions; it is not a quick "fix."  That can be months or years depending on the individual, and there's no right or wrong pace.   

What could get in the way of doing RLT Couples Coaching?
This style of work can be difficult if there are any "preconditions" that get in the way of having relationship unless those are addressed and treated first.  This does not mean "to be fully healed," as that is a subjective point of view.  The goal is to be able to thrive daily and self-regulate without these preconditions getting in the way of having relationship with oneself and with others:
  1. untreated psychiatric disorders (ADHD, depression, anxiety, OCD, etc.)
  2. untreated trauma
  3. untreated addictions
  4. untreated self medicating behaviors and/or "misery stabilizers" or distractions (i.e. workaholic, over-involvment to children,  pornagraphy,  over spending, over eating, excessive use of social media, etc.)
  5. untreated destructive acting out behaviors (infidelity, affairs, sexual abuse, physical abuse, etc.)

If you feel that there are one or more of these areas that need to be worked on or definitely get in the way of doing couples work, then stopping/pausing or taking a break from RLT couples coaching will be necessary until those things get addressed.
  • A couple can still do individual therapies to work on those preconditions and come back to RLT couples coaching  while one or both clients are doing their own therapies, with the understanding that the client(s) have been able to feel more stable to get back into doing couples work.  
  • Individual/couple is able to self-regulate more, be less reactive, less volatile, and able to thrive more daily; those blocks are not longer preventing them from functioning daily.

There are no guarantees that 12 sessions are going to magically fix everything and then "we all live happily ever after!"  That doesn't exist.  Problems will still come up, conflict will always exist, and repair will be needed when feelings get hurt.   It's what you choose to do before, during, and after those moments that is critical.  And life changing. 

That is relational empowerment.  When a person, not only considers themselves and their needs, they also consider their partner's needs, and the relationship's needs.  When both people are willing to shift into this mindset, the relationship can move out of survive-mode and into thriving!

Transformation is within yourself and within the relationship; all within your grasp.  You just have to be willing to take that step forward to reach for it, trust in yourself, your partner, and the process.  And I will help you along the way!

Testimonials

"I have found the couples coaching to be very helpful. It is a big commitment but I felt it has been very worthwhile. I particularly valued getting skills to apply. Amanda has amazing skills and are worth it."

- Andrew, MA

Price

$1,740
OR
6 payments of $298 (monthly)
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By booking this package, you agree to these Terms and Conditions

This package includes
  • 12 x 90 min appointments
  • Email after session "Recaps"
  • Communication via email, text, or cell phone
  • Individual homework or action steps in between sessions
  • Homework or action steps for the couple to work on together in between sessions.