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October 2026 'Over 40 and Unmasking' Meetup: Checking in with the community

Mark H. Durgee

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October 27, 2026 - 8pm EDT (New York), 5pm PDT (Los Angeles)

A community space for adults over 40 who discovered their neurodivergence later in life. This isn't therapy or coaching, just a welcoming place to talk about masking, identity shifts, aging, and the unique challenges of late recognition. Join however feels comfortable. Speak, listen, chat, or simply be present.

Theme: Checking in with the community

We're keeping it simple this month. Let's check in with one another. We'll connect around themes that matter to us now. Bring your challenges, wins, observations, and lived experiences to share with those who might relate. 

Share whatever you feel comfortable with, in whatever way works for you. There's no right way to participate, and your autonomy around how you show up will always be respected.

These gatherings are grounded in a befriending approach, a practice of compassionate presence popularized by Chad Varah of the Samaritans movement. Together, we create space for conversation and shared understanding without pressure to fix, advise, or reach conclusions. A place to explore the questions, experiences, and challenges you're navigating, listen with curiosity, and connect with others who may recognize parts of your experience.

Community Guidelines for Monthly Intersectional Meetups

Please review the following Community Guidelines and be prepared to follow them during our meetup. 

  1. Autonomy in Participation
    Join in the way that feels right for you. You may use your webcam, speak, type in the chat, use reactions, or simply listen. All forms of participation are valid.
  2. Confidentiality
    What is shared here stays here. Please protect the privacy of everyone in the group.
  3. No Recording
    Recording audio, video, or screenshots is not allowed. This helps keep the space safe for genuine connection.
  4. Mutual Respect
    Treat each person with care and respect. We honor diverse lived experiences, identities, and communication styles.
  5. Non-Judgment and Curiosity
    We approach each other with openness, not correction. Lived experiences may differ, and that diversity is welcome.
  6. No Advice-Giving Without Consent
    Sharing personal experiences is encouraged. Offering advice is optional and should only be given when someone clearly requests it.
  7. No Diagnosing, Pathologizing, or Gatekeeping
    We don’t evaluate or label each other, nor do we require or prioritize formal diagnosis. Access to diagnosis varies, and self-identified neurodivergent people are fully welcome and respected.
  8. Speak From Your Own Experience
    Use “I” statements and avoid assuming someone else’s reality. Every story is unique.
  9. Allow Space for All Voices
    Be mindful of participation so everyone who wants to share has the chance to do so. Support will be provided to limit sharing to windows of five minutes or less. 
  10. Identity and Intersectionality Are Respected
    We honor each person’s self-identification regarding neurodivergence, gender, sexuality, culture, and lived experience. 
  11. This Isn’t Therapy or Coaching
    These meet-ups offer conversation and community. They are not a place for crisis support, mental health treatment, or coaching sessions.
  12. Care for Yourself
     Take breaks, step away, or log off at any time. Your well-being comes first.
Register Here
This package includes
When you register, you'll receive Meltdowns: A Guide for Autistics & Allies, a five-page guide filled with practical, supportive resources you can use yourself or share with others.